would the real me please stand up - again?

good lord
lent again
where'd that come from?
marked the day in the usual way
bit of song silence word n ash
n then
inevitably 
thoughts turn
to the embedded reality of my childhood
what should i give up for Lent?

first thought
was to give up giving things up for Lent
but that would be a tad too predictable and easy
n then
nothing . . . . 

i could be wrong here
(I often am)
but the point seems to be
get rid of the dross - 
sure chocolate might be an easy choice
but what am i really saying by giving it up?
Chocolate is bad
I eat too much
i am a fat middle class consumer who doesn't know when to say no
is this what lent is about really?
did the the tradition of lent endure to slim my waist line?

i think giving up is bad word choice here
casting off is better
i want to cast off
my pride 
and stop not allowing others to be close to me, unless its on my terms
my intelligence
having,  wanting and needing to have all the answers, all the time
my masks
less time spent worrying about how i present myself (in personality terms)
and worrying about what others will think
me 
stop making it all about me! 

ahhh the moment of enlightenment
maybe Lent is the time
of it not being about me!

whatever

anyhow i am still going to try and reduce one of my meals to a simple one
in solidarity with those
who go without 
far more than I do
and if it makes me healthier
fantastic
but I am not giving up for Lent
ok???

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