I was made for Afternoons

joe cocker and the mad dogs grace the player saturday night was bowling lanes with les enfants fedoras grace the hat-stand black for winter straw for summer my t-shirt advertises long since forgotten japanese rock shows skinny ties are worn for formal occasions along with ancient doc martens princess collects tea set antiques while the prince pursues futuristic eighties cartoons ancient liturgie s are celebrated with passion latin is beginning to be understood books from childhood are revisited. i cook from elizabeth david and consider riding my bicycle more this retro life- is it escape from our modern madness malady by retreat to an idolised past? a passing fancy? or is dwelling in the present moment  only possible whilst looking behind?

"To avoid one's brokenness is to turn one's back on the possibility that the Healer might be at work here, perhaps for you, perhaps for another"  Robert Benson From here Maybe this means being honest about my lack of time, my unsteadyness, my busy-ness, my difficultly with slowing down so I can be really present . . . When I can do this, then I can invite others in, fully aware of the "I", then able to come to others without some of the baggage . . .

I am keeping my eyes open for bits and pieces which can help form an underpinning for my minstry work. Here's todays:  "Make no doubt about it, the ability to listen to another, to sit silently in the presence of God, to give sober heed, and to ponder is the nucleus . . . ”  Joan Chittister OSB From here .

T erm has just ended and I am at the beginning of a two week stretch of holidays. I feel spent emotionally, spiritually, physically - and on top of that, I just turned 42, and unusually  for me, I am not sure how I feel about that - just pretty bland actually. Ministry certainly has it's highs and lows and the last 6 months have taught me both where my strengths lie (working with people, hearing their stories and sharing their journey) and my weaknesses (my seeming inability to say no, not being able to jump from context to context as easily as I once did, not keeping my inner life nourished when stress creeps in). Not being one to easily keep resolutions, I am thinking about what I can put in place to keep me  on a far more even keel in the future. My work place have certainly listened to my concerns and my recent appraisal suggested that I be given more time in m job for reflection and spirituality work. Despite all of this, I still have to have bot...

Since I was received into the Catholic Church in 2002, one of the Easter traditions of our family is to make the journey to Holy Trinity Abbey, New Norcia, with some of our extended family, and our closest friends – aging from 2 to 70! We go to pray with our friends the monks and spend time together but most particularly to participate in the Great vigil of Easter. Now, at most parishes, the Vigil is celebrated on the Evening prior to Easter Day. Not so with the Monks. It’s early. 4:30 am to be precise. And the Vigil takes a while. Never much short of 2 ½  hours. We hear all the readings of our salvation history, light candles, splash Holy Water around and there is often a Baptism or Reception into the church as well. As with most liturgy, the Adults have grown into it through the years. We sing, read, play music and are involved in other ways with great thankfulness and privilege. Watching the little ones grow into the liturgy is a greater joy. None of our children can remember ...

Last night the ball The kids out in all their finery God-daughter to-be looking lovely (Dress by Aunty Pru, shoes courtesy of Maisey) Convivial conversation Much ooh and ahh   over dresses n suity attire I wander around A little lost A little amused Nice moment getting photos with a few kids Connection and moving on    all combined in a picture Real alpha and omega stuff My mind wanders about Hopes Dreams Past Present Future Mine and theirs Driving home, After watching them parade through for dinner then doof-doof, I suddenly felt Very old. Am I just carrying the old ways? how do i offer these bright young things hope n wisdom? questions too big for a Friday night i turn up Neil Young make my home through shimmering evening city lights thankful for the journey for love and my companions

head exploding full of plans pulling me this way n that all about whats next what are the options no more study time to do some living perhaps some changing what do the next 20 years hold? where do i want to live? how can i follow my passions? what is worth pursuing? what parts of my life need a desperate prune? what is life giving healing loving? there is an urgency here somewhat perhaps i'm a little preemptive but I see time slip slip slipping away there is so much beauty to see so many experiences yet to have but its not all chasing part of me feels the need to jump (but not off a bridge my friends) to cast off to let go and see where i land holding all this in tension with a beautiful girl the prince and the poet n the hound the basic needs of life can make it seem impossible but to set aside will not help this river keeps flowing the voice keep whispering the heart keeps calling perhaps as old Joe Campbel l said it really is...

150kms North of Perth, I am on retreat at New Norcia. Love been here - it is quiet, ordered and offers space for reflection, and of course, prayer. But I am finding that this time, it is hard to settle in. I suspect this is the result of a frenetic first week at school, and some of the  inner stuff that I came here to address. The pervading questions I have on my mind are " Where am I heading " and " Whats next?" This is not the first time for these query's however. In the past they generally led to a change of job, and in a big move, to joining the Catholic Church. This feels slightly different. I love my job, the many different people I work with, and the personal growth that come out of these close relationships. I couldn't imagine a better place for me right now. I love my family and social life. My immediate family are incredible, and my friends faithful and life-giving. I think I am talking about vision.  Maybe I am asking: What is ...

 In this no-mans land of Ordinary Time until Ash Wednesday, I am turning to the Philokalia - a collection of Spiritual writing form the Orthodox East. Whilst I have had a copy sitting on my shelves for years, this is the first time I have read it with any intent. I am especially looking at Cassians "on the eight vices".   John Cassian is an important figure in monastic life, his Conferences and Institutes containing teaching which still resonates across the Monastic East and West.  "The Eight Vices" is a reflection on those areas in our lives which bring us pain and suffering (perhaps we could even say sin?) because we fail to address them in the light of the spirit. Day 1 : On Control of the Stomach.  To eat moderately and reasonably is to keep the body in health, not to deprive it of holiness Cassian show his sense of balance immediately, beginning this discussion about the use and misuse of food immediately. Not everyone can follow the same rule of eating,...