Setting the Scene 1: Dorsal Fatigue

So after actually realising that things were not going so well I spent some good time with a psychologist friend. After a few sessions, over a long lunch, in a light bulb moment, she gently says " I think you might have dorsal fatigue"

Dorsal Fatigue (to my understanding) is when the para sympathetic and sympathetic nervous systems  - the fight/flight reflex which is an ancient way of protecting us - either goes into overdrive or shuts down. In my case it seems that I have just learnt to cope with levels of stress and anxiety rather than letting them go - and my body (as they do) reacted by saying "enough!". 

The affects of not really relaxing or getting into flow are that the subconscious pushes to restrict activities so that I can conserve the energy that is being eaten up elsewhere - energy that in the face of my dads passing I no longer had available to control the anxiety and fight/flight.

So clear now - but not then!!!

So although this is not a perfect fit for me, some of what is written here is a good fit. 
I resonate with the idea of living in the minimus. 
It's not a crisis. 
It's just that the circle of life seems smaller. 
Which is frustrating. But then breaking out of it seems too hard as well. 

Funnily the cure is connection with my long suffering and loving friends. 

Having them hang out with me and engage in social things even when I don't feel like it. 
And in the midst of all of this lots of self care, getting enough sleep, eating well, and avoiding taking on too much which is stressful (as if that is possible in the Twenty first century!) 



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