I was made for Afternoons

1. slow burning passion 2. poetry 3. guitars at midnight 4. early morning coffee 5. afternoon naps 6. gelato 7. spring 8. summer 9. france 10. miles davis 11. zen spaces 12. zen gardens 13. merton 14. button down collars 15. ben sherman 16. fred perry 17. doc martens 18. wine 19. italy 20. scooters 21. Weller 22. espresso 23. jamie oliver 24. coltrane 25. henri nouwen 26. cricket 27. pianos 28. 1960's 29. holidays 30. jammin' 31. soul 32. beatles 33. hammond organs 34. long table lunch 35. adidas 36. funk 37. friends 38. mindfulness 39. high mass 40. the jam 41. family 42. inner city 43. long afternoons 44. lemoncello 45. vespa 46. shopping 47. moonlight 48. christmas carols from kings 49. children 50. live music 51. film 52. books 53. art galleries 54. travel 55. trains 56. no agenda 57. the who 58. mod 59. casual 60. lambretta 61. cashed up 62. mindfulness 63. saturdays 64. long weekends 65. country drives 66. long lunches 67. bacon 68. knit tops 69. monks 70. candles 71. lon...

i forgive you if you need my forgiveness i release you from whatever I have bound you with i heal you from the scars and wounds I have inflicted look deep deeper inside to your core to your cave to your heart i see the names i have been called the ignorance with which i have been treated the love denied the hurt dispensed  the ignoring the labeling the failure to be seen doors closed wars raged pain and suffering abound but yet i have been loved adored even i have received gifts to raise the spirit moments of intimacy lasting friendships opportunities undreamed of had second and third chances been healed into new ways found god,  and occasionally lost god again played guitar sung lived for today  all is equal i welcome it all

after three celebrations n long country drives we return a la maison  cricket champagne hit the consumer driven centre n snap up a bargain children holiday with older generation for beaches fishing  n general down time we recover in stages changing the routine sleeping late watching tubes cruising nets cooking together but tomorrow the little uns  return n life takes on a new shape holidays  holiness  the new year will bring the promises of change new ways of being embracing n letting go now is the time to dwell in early morning stillness n mindfullness on the next phase the challange  n the joy of now r you with me freends?

strange time of year this last night paganism reigned in da guise of little 'uns collecting sweets n stuff didn't want mine to do it grumpy dad but da americanism of it all does my head in not to mention da history behind it n my bleak spiritual outook wot amazes me is that people are so unaware of the basis for holloween n buy the candy soft all american version of it tried to address this with some friends but they couldn't grasp what i was on about maybe its just me . . .  2day has easier choice all saints those who lived lives  worthy of memory of re-calling our commitment to be holy i am not much of a saint-lover but if i had to pick my top 5 i would go for: St Benedict of Nursia St Francis de Sales St Henri Nouwen St Thomas Merton St Abhishiktananda just try looking some of them up! 2morrow all souls the real deal lovingly recalling  those we know who have died n asking gods mercy n grace n love for them i have grown into this feast watched how lovingly others interce...

me n the mrs went off to da moovies on saturday saw the new adaption of waugh's brideshead rejigged i made the mistake of reading saturdays oz n seeing da review not worth your time it said but snooty nosed la di da reviewers can get it wrong too sometimes nearly always so we braved the satirical onslaught n sat with a handful of zealots through his beautiful film visually - wow rich colours beautiful soundtrack of solo piano settings from university to country house to italy to morocco n back again the cast ok i suppose well known enough to bring the britishness to life emma thompson a cold hearted roman catholic hate filled disciple the corner stone in some ways but outside of these externals the themes got me the counterpoint of a middle class existence versus the lavish wastefulness n foppery of between wars upper-class wine also featured fairly heavily n you know i am not opposed to that! the intellectual painter n atheist immersed into a fully tridentine Catholicism n all tha...

six: travel whilst i love to roam there is no place like home . . .  i love the idea of travel of british countryside and italian summers of paris in autumn  and new zealand januarys with those i love but fiscal concerns count as does stability n not exhausting my family nor dragging em round the globe this one always surfaces so hold on future we're coming seven: new norica don't get there enough. nough said eight: exercise oh dear oh dear need to walk run swim stretch and do i hmmmmmmmmmm sometimes i am good sometimes i am not so good laziness is an in built part of me n i am getting to the age where I need to move more intake less so freends a little support  if you please and there we stop freends reckon if I was doing this ok the rest would take care of itself ciao for now

one: songs little bits of ideas a chord progression a couplet of lyric a riff maybe only a concept somedays the bits can get put together sometimes what was crap yesterday sounds gold today its a blessing its a curse its part of me two: reading always the next book to get to finally got to newmans apologia pro vita sua tough read but infinitely helpful gotta finish the brothers karamazov  too but russian authors . . .  then there's cooking n sport n philosophy n art n history n fiction n poetry  and maybe even a holy text or three if only I didn't need to sleep . . .  three: praying never really off the list even on a bad day not quite sure what i mean by praying these days but a bit of divine contact silence solitude write the blog some slow psalms seems to make a difference four: the desk doesn't matter whether home nor work the time of the day the liturgical or chronological season the desk is still messy bits here bits there bills deliberately lost letters left unfinish...

i have battled much to be here . . . i have crossed wild rivers whose currents unsteadied all but the most hardy of our caravan i have travelled cross mountains whose beauty made it nigh impossible to leave i have crawled through endless deserts where water was only a dream and mirages were better than death itself i have gazed into the heart of the sun felt its rays strip me bear my eyes melt into its intensity i have watched the rain fall and the evening star appear i have seen schools of uneducated fish and parliaments of anarchist owls i have written the word and burnt the book i have sat in silence and sung the hymns i never dance i have sat with the lonely mourned with the lost eaten with the starving i have walked with the weary spoken with the mute lost with the found... to be with you has cost me no more no less than everything real the stripping away of sanity of soul of desire the transformation of all i thought i could hold onto the loss of self only to be found again mor...

drove home yesterday from the abbey me n the boys the best n bravest spent the weekend said the prayers entered silence drunk the wine (n the whisky) listened to the word n hopefully the spirit were fed in da stomach n da spirit sang our hearts out raided the library talked with our monastic friends grieved their loss discussed our pain tired to heal some hurts slept talked read walked waited hoped loved looked back looked forward just were there

me mate mark wrote a great question on his book face why (do)so many churches appear to be uninterested in reaching the community around them n this little author  never short of an ecclesial opinion muttered  something about it being the wrong question  n why weren't churches offering what people actually need" ? (if ya have fake book ya can check this out for ya self) n so the comments continued n wif my usual dry wit i made a plea for stability honesty openness dialogue n maybe as a good little monastic i should have added conversatio morum (go n look it up) but (n i am on shaky ground here 'cos i am thinking out loud) i wonder if  most of the time we could walk the talk do  what we say we believe treat  people in our groups the way we know they should be treated n  learn to  shut up  when we dont know i reckon our churches might just be a little more  well full! all this not to mention actually trying to help people with living our  modern lives of stress limitless opt...

here we are again your iconoclastic correspondent has been laid low by the bug of death a gnawing gastro  which saps the spirit n strength write out of you luckily for all todays pleasant yum-cha lunch appears to be staying where it belongs . . .  the earth changed permanently for me yesterday a phone call from my second home the abbey of new norcia just to discuss some mundane matters then  silence a few words the abbot is dead wordless disbelief pulsates heart drops shoulders fall deep breathes  sometimes i encounter this stuff occasionally  but when it someone you know well who liturgically bought you in who took the time to chat when i was up a creek who shared the table with you with such glee its an empty hole and not just for me but for so many like me so pray friends as we all think as we all pray as we all hope n pray for the brothers who face decisions n change n all the emotions of losing  a loved one peace to all

what keeps me going? wine, woman n song time, space n prayer father son n holy spirit john paul george n ringo olive oil parmesan n garlic friday saturday sunday past present future eliza noah coralie holidays holy-days birthdays me us them books newspapers n magazines coffee milk sugar coffee coffee coffee cd's tapes lp's crosby stills nash (n young!) poems novels articles fish chips n squid lemon lime orange mind heart soul mass eucharist lords supper smells bells n stained glass cricket rugby n  walking strolling rambling daily shambolic reinvention early morning cuddles late night discussions breakfast with friends dinner by moonlight endless possible outcomes not giving in not giving up not being afraid not running away embracing change embracing now forgiveness love you

lack of inspiration perhaps just holiday re-alignment perhaps mystcal wanderings led me here for a hint a clue a thought Why do you write? i write cos i want to except when i dont i write cos i expect something to happen but i dont get blue when it dont i write to explore ideas but i always seem to come back to the same ones i write cos i like the way some words flow together n how other bash and writhe when placed together i write to you freends but its all about me not you i write to kick myself out of all sorts of malaise spiritual financial artistic emotional musical i write just to get it out but there is usually so much more left inside i write cos i like writers c s lewis ursula le guin tolkein my sort-of-aunt nz poet rachel Bush like my friend sonia helbig-timms i write to feel like just sometimes i am doing something that i can be creative that i can give some reflection to what is going on inside me and that just maybe my experience might be someone elses i write to cajole...

rain wind cold all through the night n into the day the prince joins me at about 3am the howling like a banshees cry of revenge angry trees around the house swaying n moving dark clouds menace the sky heavy downpours their only weapon perhaps first night in a new bed or the first time he has been aware of this sort of weather for whatever reason ck n I spend an hour with him traversing the triangle of our beds our words designed to coax him back to his own bed his only thought staying out of it! i loved nights like this as a boy especially with thunder n lightning the bitter darkness echoing some hidden part of me so we awake this morning and the storm is mildly abated enough for a walk a play for the poet a fish for the prince wolf ever thought of yourself as one? i remember seen a friend a therapist who had a sort of mosaic of wolves as the picture up above his desk… last book I finished The main character becomes one with a wolf to the extent he can leave his body to death n become ...

long drives through country through early morning traffic through fields of golden canola n cooling pine plantations we stick to the back paths keeping away from the tourist caravans n out of the way of horses children and balloons of any descriptions . . . so yesterday the music today the books robin hobb - the assassin series loving these new books ( i am on the second instalment) self contained worlds give me much pleasure can’t recall if I wrote about this earlier tolkien, narnia, earthsea all etched in my memory as an 11 or 12 year old i lived in these places they became part of me their values often became mine i loved the nobility honesty silence was taught as a skill to be loved that a man only does what needs to be done that a life poured out for others in taking responsibility is a life of value sometimes I feel like these values are not of this time like i am, like these writers against the flow against the tide standing outside what is currently valued n feeling alone

warm day n sun so the holy days of spring begin children can play outside we clean and tidy preparing for a trip on the morrow through the countryside heading south through hills to the coast n the wife's forefathers traditionally this time of year fills me with a morbid dread i see the future the next few months n overwhelming fear fills me end of year celebrations become a chore attending to people wearying and dreary i seek refuge and discipline merely to survive it is hard to welcome that which slays your sense of self of equilibrium of a universe which makes sense at least now i am relieved of the need to write endless reports on the lives of children now i can write endlessly about myself . . .  as i write this i listen to youtube crosby stills nash n young i love this music on saturday night we have a killer show in oz called rockwiz anyway two local fairly b grade musos sang neil young's comes a time and so the obsession awakens again discovering new artists going deepe...

i saw the city encased in mist n rain n dark a tomb of fantasy a womb of silence it made me silent within silenced my monkey brain stilled the raging river i stared for a moment n then the torrents of the day continued people n things n events n conversations but here in the wild west rain poured  wind howled clouds gathered in their fields children donned their wellies n jumped in puddles teachers cursed and reached for movies some snuggled deeper into their blankets  n slept the day away others ignored the ambience of the day raised their brollies n continued their way affected but unhindered lonely poets saw lovers tears bright eyed youngsters saw endless tales the ill saw their reflection the housebound saw yet another reason  to stay hidden the ancient thought of trenches fisherman stared out at a stormy seas not willing to give up their secrets today artists writers musicians n painter found inspiration your humble correspondent dreamt of lands now lost kings n queens n suits of ...

decisions come decisions go moons waxing and waning shooting stars lost in galaxies unknown slipping silently  into black holes of my own making but if we could but see beyond things temporal how our word here a thought there plays out on a cosmic scale anothers loss our gain anothers hope our fear anothers dream our reality their darkness our light their words our curse their freedom our captivity but it will not do to dwell on such things here for light can be dimmed by a mere spoken word hearts broken  by a look your history told to another in the touch of your hand traverse this place lightly and be of good cheer for the future is not yet beheld

Chris at WYD Werld Yooth Dae its buzee its crowded it is not in the least contemplative but I am here and I will be still and we will see how it goes ha!

This is not a poem.  Nor a meme.  Not even a reflection or a meditation.  This is me working out how a 500 year old church can cause such pain to many of its members in one foul swoop.  Got an Idea what I am talking about? On Monday 7th July the General Synod of the Church of England voted to allow the ordination of Women to the episcopate. You can read about it here  -  a very neutral report. Whilst this action would have caused traditionalists at both ends of the anglocatholic/evangelical scale pain, the matter appears to have been exacerbated by the synods decision to only enforce a code of practice about how to deal with those opposed to womens ordination rather than create guaranteed episcopal care. A few anglo-catholic blogs (my heritage) have reflected upon this here , here and here . (You'll have to search around the first two a bit as there aren't permalinks in operation - but look for 7/8 July and you'll find them.) My big problem with all of this is not really t...

I must be a bit bored as I keep using Meme's to get me the info I want! 1. Name a Catholic book that you want to share so much that you keep giving away copies:  Henri Nouwen "The Genesee Diary". Honest. Monastic. Liturgical. Wow. 2 Name a work of religious art you'd like to live with:  "Circumnavigation of the Soul" 3. Name your favorite Catholic artist:  I'm not sure. 4. Name a work of Catholic fiction which has penetrated your real life:  The Lord of The Rings Trilogy - J.R.R.Tolkein 5. Name your favorite Catholic Musicians - male & female:  John Michael Talbot - is Phil Keaggy a Catholic Again yet? 6. Name your favorite musical:  ummmmm wot? 7. Name a punch line that always makes you laugh: [ W alter Becker - Bob is not your Uncle anymore . . . 

Its my birthday tomorrow! 39 and still goovy! We take off on the ferry to Rottnest early in the morning to have a few days time out but for now here’s a great birthday meme! The instructions: 1) Go to Wikipedia 2) In the search box, type your birth month and day but not the year. 3) List three events that happened on your birthday 4) List two important birthdays and one death 5) One holiday or observance (if any) Here are mine: Three things that happened on my birthday 1189 - Richard the Lionheart is crowned King of England. 1535 - Sir Thomas More , author of Utopia and one time Lord Chancellor of England , is executed for treason by King Henry VIII after refusing to agree to Henry's decision to separate the English church from the Roman Catholic church . 1942 - Anne Frank and her family went into hiding in the " Secret Annexe " above her father's office in an Amsterdam warehouse . Two important birthdays and one death 1865 ...

A Purpose-Driven Life? 1. What do you think is your purpose in life? Life is about personal exploration and both living and reflecting on its mystery. To be the best me I can be, create, communicate and spread some love, joy and peace. 2. What is your greatest gift to the world? To be my best true self. Whatever that is and wherever I find it, I offer that wholeness back. Anything else is a poor copy drawn from poor motives. 3. Is charity important to you? If so, how do you give back? I give back in small, not large gestures. Love those closest to you. Live well. Live with honesty, Support those you love. Create spaces for growth and healing. Create moments for joy and celebration. 4. Is life worth all the problems in the world? The world will always have problems. In some ways globalisation has made things worse. We see all the worlds huge and aweful issues, but often forget the begger at our door, the addict at our gate. our starving countrymen. Life, for me, is to begin to see what ...

D o you believe in creationism or evolution? Which one makes more sense to you? Why? This is a big question which seems to matter beyond any to some Christians. I have to say that it doesn't worry me too much and I tend to sit on the fence.   I am swayed by thinking that looks at the biblical text and asks what the audience was, the context in which it was written, and the cultural understanding 0f what that text would have meant at the time - really trying not to take to much at face value with my judging western mind. I suppose at the root of it I can accept that either creationism or evolution can be true, but more importantly for me is the loving God behind it all who calls me to realtionship with him/her. As the  Catechism  puts it, "... research in all branches of knowledge, provided it is carried out in a truly scientific manner and does not override moral laws, can never conflict with the faith, because the things of the world and the things the of the faith derive fr...

Do you read the Bible? If so, what is your favorite Bible story? Yes I do read the bible most days. At the moment I try to do some Lectio Divina in the early evening using a chapter from each the Old and New Testament. At the moment that is the beginning of Job, and the end of 1 John. Is it hard work? Yep. Do I enjoy it? Sometimes. Am I very faithful to it? Nope Would I like to be? Yep. As favourite stories, I think the Road to Emmaus is up there, as is the coming of the Ma gi. Loved that since I was a little un. Pax. H/T that’s my answer!

Feel free to play along . . .  1. O f all the bands/artists in your cd /record collection, which one do you own the most albums by? Outright winner in all categories would be Paul Weller - from the Jam through the Style Council and in to the Solo years. AND he's finally coming to Perth in August!!! :) 2. What was the last song you listened to? “Regret" by New Order, which just flicked across lastfm .com 3. What’s in your record/ cd player right now? The new Walter Becker Album "Circus Money" 4. What song would you say sums you up? Today it would be Simply Red "Money's too tight to mention" but generally I think Paul Weller's song "Into Tomorrow" pretty much sums me up getting a bit older but having a fair bit of faith in moving on up. 5. What’s your favorite local band? Eurogliders were pretty damn awesome and souly funky aussie band. Grace Knight had great pipes, and although Bernie couldn't play guitar to save himself, he knew hi...

so i leave school full of plans for music girls n more music break my arm on the holidays before so magically avoiding doing my audition for the course survive first 1/2 of semester date a lovely girl get close breakup but we're still friends even now go on a camp meet another girl get really close we go out for a couple o years she is great lots of love n well, you know wot young people do . . . lots of music besides that playing my horns during the day reading the scores and discovering debussy n saint saens n satie early music n renaissance stuff experiment with sackbuts n the like enjoy being arty farty n almost being encouraged to do so start playing on some peoples tapes n cd's not an easy gig for a young muso heres the track heres the key we want you to play something cool here no not that no not that either oh thats sort of it oh forget my ideas -what do you want to play? anyway sure you get the idea it was fun sometimes i got paid sometimes it was for love sometimes it...

yeah well the eighties you sorta had to be there I guess don't wanna dwell too much on school it was there so was i got beat up a bit usually 'cos i was a muso and not a sporty dude sang in a genuine working church choir learnt my trade there taught my ears to work to hear inside the sounds to sing harmony to love the purity of early music n chant yeah it was a good footing but also i learnt the faith through singing these ancient words of motets n masses n magnificats the eighties for seemed to be a schizophrenic moment between the classical music world of my school life choir n clarinet  n my discovery of the rock world just beginning to come into bloom it is still taking years for me to try n bring these two into some sort of harmony or maybe realize I don't need to  they can feed each other without me having to perform some sort of symbiotic dance anyway i woke up singing shout to the top one morning and that was it went out and bought the style councils cafe bleu that...

right o mid seventies becomes a shocker all disco n glitter punk comes n goes somethings remain the same i'm at school learning  sorta fitting in not so great at sport not so bad at thinking very good a la musica parents doing hippy charismaticy christian thing didn't do it for me still doesn't shocking photo of me mid seventies wedding brown corduroy flares gold skivvy brown desert boots bronze medallion no wonder I wanted to be a mod when I figured it out anyway those few years pass i dig lego start recorder playing read lots myths n legends n narnia n earthsea my faves if those names mean nothing to ya then get yourself together and by the texts dr who fills my imagination and almost suffocates me then  almost to the day i can remember  new years eve 1979 heading into the eighties my old dad and i still up latish watching the telly i'm about 10 1/2 and on comes a retrospective of "popular music" in the seventies not much I recall except  afros n gui...

I was 6 months when the super seventies began started innocuously enough i guess all nappies n bottles n terry toweling wonder suits i was probably happy then all my needs met i guess then inevitably you start to grow memories become firmer become clearer the house we lived in sorrento victoria on the coast - wild and woolly life-taking back beach summer holiday makers learning to read little bro pk turns up and so begins another adventure we lived there till 75 only real memories are of Suzy the dog a thundery night hiding under a table n doing belly flops in a little paddling pool outside not much hey? anyhoo we move to reservoir on melbournes outskirts so begins some of my obsessions working classness inner city life liturgy n church music . . . apparently we'd go to bed and then mum n dad would put on lps i'd float out of bed like a moth to a flame n lie outside the lounge room doors n fall asleep listening to the sounds guess i just couldn't fight it huh? School too...

(thanks to Kilbey for the idea...) 1969/70 man lands on the moon woodstock, mud n madness altamont, death and decay of the dream vietnam in full flight some coming home alive,  some coming home in bags in the midst of it all out I come few weeks early trying to poison mother not my best move but nonetheless it all seemed to work out... arriving on a sunday my dad racing from church to see me apparently fighting with nurses n all n sundry to get in not the done thing in those days -  men were to pace the corridors n wait with the other blokes not feel comfortable with being there but things were changing even then n my old man, the european in him always seemed to win out embrace the new regardless so there he was with  the Mr Hattam catching the end of the action. seems I was a happy enough bub ate too much even then (you should see the pictures - the michelin man in action!) born in inner city melbourne  st andrews its funny how when i get back there i always love those suburbs they a...

so i am back at work doing the talking listening praying thing the been around thing they come n go i get tired i wait i do no-thing in particular sometimes i go in ll guns blazing n stuff it up other times dont do enough n watch the walls come tumbling down in slow motion but i feel the connection my own bases covered my partner she of curly hair and undeniable talent who sustains n heals n shows me she loves in the most beautiful ways my best friend of silent moments and thoughts shared who walks with me through this journey and opens her heart my little ones the singing reading writing riding tv -watching maniacs who need love care n a good time! my circle with all their joinings break-ups love n hate who seems to always be there whatever n never give up on me these are the reasons i go back n do it all again n face my own demons to help others better stop running n hiding play my guitar and sing celebrating life

days spent listening healing inquiring kairos chronos ticking clocks mark hours mark moments words n thoughts emotions jealousy n hate anger n frustration depression hopelessly hopeful flat n squashed confused confessed concealed co dependant i dance around with them i probe n wait hear the space empathize elongate erridite i write i read i look for clues i get supervised i get drunk i get out i wait n wait they return we cover the ground again n again tears smiles hugs reports are filled papers are shuffled i change do they? what do i offer cannot ask cannot answer just be be open be me be there be truly in the moment be silent be still be centered be present be love this therapists life

errgghhh ... the world is strange place no? the outside world with its wars n pain n greed n suffering its beauty n love n art n moosic n cuisine its colours n sounds n seasons n rhythms confuses n crosses destroys n derides beautifies n balances enhances n energizes what a place to live everyday on the line seeing the unseesable hearing the silent imagining the future but the inside world is vastly more deeper n wider richer n more silent the place of clarity n great confusion the place of great love n yet great hate a place to grow but yet where refuge can be sort this unmapped landscape each of us taking our own way with the help of others why do we criticize the guides sent to help us the loving jesus the silent buddha the myriad krishna ? the followers of each spurn the others even the most tolerant will stick to their guns in the last battle only a few transcend into real dialogue into true openness which doesn't cling but hopes n speaks of together not apart of both and not ...

love jumps from one to another a seemingly endless journey drawing some in n leaving others behind dizzy n nervous transformed worn n weary my world is full of lovers old n new one love is ending crushingly... is the way it is supposed to be? is this the way its mystery is supposed to go? leaving pain n resentment hurt things unsaid or implied wounds which make you wonder if they will ever heal? searching endlessly for a way back only to find those roads closed flooded by the moments you never quite grasped bridges broken by words you never said actions you never desired grey bleakness fills you some sort of resignation takes hold and the dark night can even look brighter than this day i can only watch this sinister dance n hope n pray n hope my own silence may heal theirs a new love is forming a soul friend has been making new discoveries her joy n happiness a beacon as the mystery of love n connection overtake her there is much hope n mystery n magic abounding in these moments lookin...

What to do when madness becomes your ally your friend and a most attractive quality . . . ?

Rhyme n reason Past n present Love n hate Pain n joy Fear n hope Relaxed n anxious Drunk n sober Pagan n spiritual New n old Time n stress Wife n kids Good n bad Friends n family Sickness n healing Broke n rich Happy n sad Flying n grounded Washed n dirty All the opposites Forcing n fighting their way from inside out Tearing n groping Wanting their way Insisting on it Be one – be the other One must conqour One must lose You must You can You will You donkey! But: See the pattern Read the writings Quote the masters Sing the songs Watch the stars Say the prayers Light the candles Memorize the texts Perform the ritual Wash in the river Wait Look See All is necessary part of the big picture that we cannot hope to see the darkened mirror . . . what unites us is far far greater than what keeps us apart what heals us is often right in the eyes of our friends.